I had been unsure of what to do with my two-week winter vacation until yesterday. It became perfectly clear in moments. I’ll go to Tokyo on a mission.

You see, news came out that one of the bands I’m most attached to, Panic☆ch will be disbanding. From their blogs it was easy to see that they’ve been having rough times since the summer. I suppose it should have been something obvious, though all of the promises of, “We’ll always do our best!” lure you into a kind of denial after a while.

Even now, it has been clarified that what the vocalist actually said was there shall be an ‘activity pause’. I really should be hopeful too. The official reason for this pause is the drummer leaving. The band has faced three members leaving at once in the past, so you’d think this would only be a minor setback.

Either way, the news hit me hard.

I’ve followed this band closely since my junior year of high school. How long ago was that now? I used to study Japanese by reading their blogs. I used to always say I wanted to become their roadie (was I joking or not?) I always loved the way they were the perfect image of an indie band; always working hard to promote themselves, constantly trying to make their sound better and better, doing whatever the hell they wanted and hoping someone would enjoy it. Their previous drummer is one of my biggest inspirations. Their current and former members are all lovable. I could give you a hundred reasons, but you’d probably never get it entirely.

I guess in the end it feels weird that something I’ve invested so much time in is going to disappear after I finally get the chance to become near to it.

So I have to see them at least once. I’m gunning for the December 31st show, depending on how my travel plans work out.

Maybe I’ll go again during spring break to see their last show.



~ by megumiwasframed on December 5, 2010.

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